epic FAIL*

After seeing them just yesterday, I tried to make these Chocolate Yogurt Snack Cakes at 11pm last night. I was that excited to make them that it seemed reasonable to cook at 11pm.

Tried being the operative word...

I'm not sure exactly what went wrong - i'm thinking it had something to do with expired oil? (who knew vegetable oil expired??? how come no one ever told me this before???)

They look pretty - i wish they tasted that way...

(*edit: ok, they seem to be better - but still not great - the second day... yes, even though i hated them, i brought them to work anyway... I think unexpired oil, cut down by just a little, would be a big improvement... also, the addition of ice cream would help...)

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Chocolate Yogurt Snack Cakes
courtesy of David Lebovitz’s The Sweet Life in Paris, via Smitten Kitchen, minor changes by me

7 ounces (200 grams) bittersweet or semisweet chocolate, coarsely chopped
1/2 cup (125 ml) vegetable oil
1/2 cup (125 ml) plain, 2% greek yogurt
1 cup (200 grams) sugar
3 large eggs, at room temperature
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon almond extract
1 1/2 cups (200 grams) flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon coarse salt

Preheat the oven to 350°F , line a 12-cup muffin tin with paper cupcake liners

Melt the chocolate with 1/4 cup of the oil, via microwave - first microwaving for 35 seconds, stiring, and then 1x or 2x more for 15 seconds each, stirring inbetween.

In another bowl, mix the remaining 1/4 cup oil with yougurt, sugar, eggs and vanilla and almond extracts.

In a large bowl, whisk the flour, baking powder, and salt. Make a well in the center of the flour mixture and pour in the yogurt mixture. Stir lightly a couple times, then add the melted chocolate and stir until just smooth.

Divide the batter among the muffin cups and bake for 25 minutes or until they feel barely set in the middle and a tester or toothpick comes out clean.

Remove from the oven and cool on a wire rack before serving

Dear Martha Stewart,

Hi Martha. How's it going?

You know, I've always been a Martha fan. own the cookie book. subscribe to some of the daily emails. even almost went to work for your company (albeit while you were *ahem* away...)

So the other day when yet another martha stewart mac & cheese recipe landed in my inbox, i thought to myself, 'self... you know all that CSA cheese you got? how you thought it was totally neccessary to order 24 oz of cheese at one time? well, self, this recipe will totally use up some of that! 12 oz of that! do it! make it!' and since i always listen to the voices in my head (when they are suggesting that i eat bad-for-me food) i printed out that recipe and headed to the grocery store to pick up a few things i didnt have. namely macaroni and panko... 3 cups of panko. even though that sounded like an awful lot of panko... but martha, you are an empire unto yourself. who am i to question?

so even as i worked - cooking the mac & making the cheese sauce - i just kept thinking - 3 cups? i must be reading that wrong... but no, i'd look at it time and again and sure enough, 3 cups. and then i'd think to myself... well she said 3 c of fresh breadcrumbs... is it possible that panko is THAT MUCH DENSER? and i'm all like, nah. just a different taste...

so anyway, i motored on and put it all together and poured that panko/butter mix over the top. over and over and over. it felt like i was my dog burying my bone in the backyard. or a kid in a sandbox. yeah, kid in a sandbox - lets stick with that one...

but martha, i had faith. faith in you and your copywriters and your commenters... it would be good. it would be fine.

and then i took it out. and lady, you need to hire new editors... because there aint NO WAY IN HELL that there should have been 3 cups of breadcrumbs - fresh, panko or otherwise - on top of that mac & cheese. NO WAY IN HELL.

i scraped off about 2 cups

and honestly, the mac & cheese was still fairly dry.

therefore martha, consider this my PSA... because now when people google 'martha stewart macaroni and cheese recipe correction' they'll end up here. instead of writing you letters telling you that you owe them $2.49 for all that wasted panko...

Sincerely,
Kristen at kitchenhell

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Macaroni & Cheese
slightly adjusted and corrected courtesy of me with original mistake from Martha Stewart

1 pound elbo macaroni
Coarse sea salt

6 tablespoons butter
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
4 cups milk
1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg

3 cups shredded (12 ounces) sharp white cheddar cheese
1/3 cup finely grated Parmesan cheese

3/4 cup panko



Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

Cook pasta in a large pot of boiling salted water 1 to 2 minutes less than package instructions.
Drain, rinse with cool water, and place into baking dish (I used an 8x12. You can use something bigger or make individual portions - cooking times are listed at the end).

Meanwhile, heat 4 tablespoons butter in a medium saucepan over medium-high heat.
Add flour; cook, whisking, 1 minute.
Add milk, cayenne, nutmeg, and 2 teaspoons salt; bring to a simmer.
Cook, whisking, until mixture is thick enough to coat the back of a spoon, 2 to 3 minutes.
Whisk in cheeses until smooth.

Pour over pasta; toss to coat.

Melt remaining 2 tablespoons butter; toss with breadcrumbs.
Sprinkle over pasta.

Cover baking dish with foil. Bake until bubbling, 60 to 70 minutes for large dishes, 40 to 50 minutes for small. (check after 35 mins for individual sized dishes)

Remove foil; continue baking until golden, 5 to 10 minutes more.

bad day solution

if you read my other blog, you already know i had a craptastic day. if you dont read it, i'll recap... annoying people on the subway, annoying people at work, annoying people at the lab, annoying people at time warner...

i thought the solution to my bad day was to go out and get myself some Sabra hummus for dinner (seriously, i cant even make it that cheap, so why bother trying? theirs is SO good!) even though it meant changing out of my PJs and back into real clothes...
so i did that, and it was good, but it wasnt good enough...

i needed more. i needed cookies.

(it is worth mentioning that today was supposed to be the start of 'operation: body makeover' but it was squashed by the fact that my shiny new gym membership may be cheaper through our new insurance, which means i need to find out the details before i sign up and spend too much...)

nothing fancy - half of a batch of the good ol fashioned toll house cookie recipe. plus coconut. plus one mistake...

the recipe calls for softened butter... in a very typical moment of impatience, i wanted the butter softened like, 5 minutes ago. so i put it in the microwave. and forgot about it until i heard it bubbling. oops... i thought that i should let it cool before beating, but figured i might as well add the sugar and then cool it... and by cool it, i mean put it in the fridge.

then i got more impatient and added the egg, the vanilla, the salt and the baking soda. and put it back in the fridge.

then i got more impatient and took it out. it was still quite melty, but whatever. i wanted cookies NOW, not in an hour...

so i beat the hell out of the mixture... until it seemed like it came as close to resembling softened butter as possible... it was holding some shape - i figured that was enough, right? mixed in the flour (a bit more than i even should have) and then got a little nervous - the batter seemed more like batter than like dough...

but thank god for that coconut... (not the sweetened kind, the kind you get out of the bulk food bin in the supermarket...) i mixed in the chips and the coconut and i guess the dried coconut soaked up just the right amount of liquid, (liquid caused by melted butter. duh.) cause now it seemed right.

i was still a bit skeptical but wow - thats a mistake i'll make over and over... the cookies are a little crisp on the outside and almost a little cakey on the inside...


the chips are soft but not mushed. and the coconut is there, but its just a hint of flavor... um, yum...

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Chocolate Chip Coconut Mistake Cookies
screwed up courtesy of the standard Toll House Cookie recipe

1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup (1 sticks) butter, melted and then cooled
3/4 cup sugar - half granulated sugar, half packed brown sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 large egg
1 cup NESTLÉ® TOLL HOUSE® Semi-Sweet Chocolate Morsels
scant 1/2 cup organic coconut flakes (not sweetened)


PREHEAT oven to 375° F.

In microwave, melt butter in medium sized (non-metal) mixing bowl. 1 min, 15 seconds should do it.

Mix sugars, vanilla, salt and baking soda in with melted butter. Add egg.
Refrigerate for 5 minutes or more, if you can stand the waiting.

Beat melted butter mixture on medium high until it starts to get lighter, fluffier and hold some shape... probably a good 3 or 4 minutes...

Gradually beat in flour mixture. Stir in chips and coconut. Drop by heaping tablespoons onto baking sheet lined with parchment paper.

BAKE for 10 to 12 minutes or until golden brown. Cool on baking sheets for 5 minutes; remove to wire racks to cool completely.

Dough can also be frozen. Wrap in wax paper, form into a log and wrap the whole thing in a freezer bag. I hear it will last this way for up to 8 weeks, but who the heck has cookie dough in their freezer for 8 weeks???